“You yourself have kept track of my misery. Put my tears into your bottle – aren’t they on your scroll already?”
Psalm 56:8 (Common English Bible)
Many of
us have a bucket list – a list of experiences we would cherish before death.
They require no explanation to others, no defense. They are deeply personal.
Further, an explanation may reduce the depth, color, and richness of personal
meaning. Most people recognize that what is experienced deeply can rarely be
expressed with words. Words are useful for the communication of thought. They
are less useful for conveying deeply held emotions, feelings, and convictions.
A strong writer can approach this depth of meaning better than most. But
always, words have a reducing effect. Permit me to simply state that high on my
bucket list are three experiences I would value: a cameo appearance in a stage
production of the musical RENT, a balloon handler in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, and sharing a cappuccino with David Hyde Pierce.
Some will
remember that David Hyde Pierce played the character of Niles Crane on the
popular television series, Frasier. On three occasions I have enjoyed David Hyde
Pierce on a Broadway stage: Spamalot,
Curtains, and Vanya and Sonia and Masha and
Spike. If I were to have an occasion to have a private conversation with
Pierce over coffee my first question to him would be, “What makes you cry?” An
answer to that question often points to deeply held convictions; points to
those values, and struggles, and principles that grip our hearts. Again, words
are limiting. But they can point another in the right direction. An answer to
the question, “What makes you cry?” provides a window into the depths of
another’s soul.
Naturally,
tears come in a rich variety. A powerful conviction of truth draws tears to my
eyes every time. I simply cannot read in Luke’s Gospel the story of Simeon
taking the infant Jesus in his arms without my chest becoming heavy and tears
forming in my eyes. Here, Simeon recognizes this child as God’s salvation. This
is a story that reaches beyond the descriptive; it is evocative. In faith,
Simeon sees God’s decisive hand in the unfolding drama of human history. Grief
is another variety of tears. Old Testament teacher, Walter Brueggemann helps us
with understanding this passage from the Psalms. Here is a confidence that God
has kept, treasured, and preserved “my tears”; that is, all the pain and
suffering that the psalmist has experienced. “God is the great rememberer who
treasures pain so that the psalmist is free to move beyond that pain.”[i]
There is
an ancient Jewish practice that provides care in times of misery and grief. A
small bottle is provided to collect the tears of anguish and loss. The top of
the bottle has a small hole in it that would allow those tears to evaporate
over time. When the bottle is completely dry, the time for grieving is over.
The Psalmist wants us to know that God has a bottle with our name on it. When
tears of grief flow, God collects them in that bottle. This is how seriously
God takes our grief; how God honors and shares in our loss. But there is a
small hole in the top of that bottle. Over time the tears will evaporate. When
the bottle is dry, and our eyes are clear, we see that God remains. And God
redirects our eyes to tomorrow.
Joy,
[i]
Walter Brueggemann, William H. Bellinger, Jr., Psalms: New Cambridge Bible Commentary.
(New York, New York: Cambridge University Press, 2018) 254.
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